To rebuild a broken relationship someone has to make the first move. That someone will have to be you. Pursuing peace is within your control. You have to be intentional and you have to get started today. Do not put off reconciliation. Every day you wait, it only gets harder.
Before all else, take the situation to God. Ask for guidance and clarity of mind.
The currency of every relationship is trust. If you want others to start believing the best about you, you have to start by believing the best about them. Yes, you have been hurt. However, until you can begin to trust them, the broken pieces will not mend.
Acknowledge your part
Before you can ask someone to move in your direction, you first have to ask if you are doing everything you need to do. When you take a step toward healing a broken relationship, it will always cost you more than you want to pay. But if you don’t deal with it today, it will cost you even more down the line.
Here’s the thing. You need to acquire new tools. The tools you currently have are what brought you to where you are today. This will be inconvenient. It is a hassle to restore what was broken. It is time consuming and painful, but the longer you wait, the harder it will be.
Seek out the wisdom of those who have walked this path already. Talk to a counselor, join a community group, listen to podcasts and read marriage books geared towards healing.
Open the door
Empathy is the key that opens up the door to dialogue. When you begin to look at the situation, not through your own hurts but through theirs, you can begin to see with clarity. It won’t fix your problems, but it will give you insight into what went wrong. Empathy will help you understand and honor boundaries and rules of engagement.
Just as God’s love is unending and relentless, decide now to love others as you have been loved. Move toward a place of peace. Even if you don’t receive peace in the relationship, you can receive peace about the relationship.
Forgive. Love. Honor boundaries set out. Work toward reconciliation and own your part in the fracture.
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