The pursuit of peace in a relationship is a catalyst to peace in the rest of your lives.
Romans 12:18-21 (NIV) says, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord. On the contrary: ‘If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.’ Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”
Christ has called you and me to restore what was broken with good, not avenge with evil.
Move toward freedom
Restoration is a move toward freedom, and friend freedom is possible. It requires that you intentionally take the first step. If you do not pursue peace intentionally you will never achieve it. The first step is forgiveness.
Forgiveness becomes possible when we start seeing others as children of God who are loved and cherished. That same radical grace given to you from God, you have to understand it before you can start handing it out to others. You can’t give away what you have not first received.
Start by accepting God’s unfailing, unconditional love of you.
Do this next
Pause for a moment and make a list of every way you have been wronged. Then choose to forgive each of those hurts specifically. Don’t hold it over anyone. Let it go. Remember all that you have done wrong in life and that God forgave you for every single item on your list.
Restoration only happens when we begin to forgive. Release the conflict and forgive the debt. Take the first step. Love keeps no record of wrong.
Making peace with others clears the path to making peace with God. If all you ever do is cast blame you will never find peace. In fact, Jesus said in Matthew 5:23 that our relationships with one another are central to our relationship with him. If what you seek is a more fulfilling relationship with God then you must live out the gospel of reconciliation.